My son is a bully

I have come to terms with the fact that my cute, adorable son is a bully. He is easy going and sweet to adults, but when it comes to babies who are smaller than him....he's a bully.

Well, okay, really, he's just a bully to Silas. Silas is Brynn's son http://lovebrynn.wordpress.com/
Silas is older than Patrick, but a little smaller and he came over on Monday afternoon so his mom and dad could go save the world or something. Silas was so cute and woke up from his nap in the pack and play and wanted his paci for a few more minutes after he woke up. My son crawled over to the barely awake Silas and took out his paci. He took it out of his mouth and then held it right out of Silas' reach. I gave it back to Silas and Patrick did this same action over and over again.

The oddest thing was that he would look at Silas after he did it to see how Silas would react.

He's a big bully.

When they play together at church, Patrick immediately goes to whatever Silas has and tries to take it away from him.

I wouldn't play with Patrick anymore if I was Silas.

This is so different from what I am used to dealing with. I am used to my very dramatic, very sensitive little girl getting her feelings hurt because someone forgot to wave to her in the parking lot. Or they didn't notice that she was wearing a new pink skirt with sparkles on it.

Could I have two more opposite kids?

Good thing they are cute.

(Wouldn't that be a good title to a blog? Or a good way to end every post about my kids? Good thing they are cute? I sense a new catch phrase coming on....)

I wish...

• I wish that I could post pictures of Patrick on the internet. He is so photogenic and cute.
• I wish that the world could share in seeing his cuteness.
• I wish I knew what was going to happen in his court case this week.
• I wish I knew if we were going to have him next year.
• I wish I knew if we would be able to adopt him.
• I wish that it didn't take a court document for us to take him on vacation.
• I wish I could step into the future and just see if we still had him. Then, I would come back to present time and keep living the rollercoaster ride.
• I wish I knew the best way to explain all of this to him when he gets older and starts asking questions.
• I wish that he would be here later to ask me lots of questions.
• I wish I knew that no matter where he was living that he would be safe.
• I wish that I could honestly say that I prayed for his future everyday.
• I wish that his mom was a healthy person.
• I secretly wish that her health/safety didn't determine whether or not he was ours forever.
• I wish the judge who makes decisions for Patrick's life could see a glimpse into his life.
• I wish that the judge who rules in his case would make the best decision for him.
• I wish I could end this post with the cute picture of him that I am looking at right now.

A poll (because Brynn does it and it looks cool)

I've been blogging for a while.I've never really cared who looked at my blog. I put a stat counter on my blog and I'm becoming a little obsessed with it. At night, I'll see who looked at my blog and start questioning Steven.

Me: Steven, who do you know that lives in Iceland?

Steven: UH....no one

Me: Come on, think! It's got to be someone you know.

So, I posted a poll here. If you blog, do you track who is looking at your blog?

Do you track who reads your blog?answers

Teething

Patrick is hurting tonight. I went to his room around 9 p.m. because he was crying. I went in to check on him and see if I could get him back to sleep. When I went in his room, he was SCREAMING. I couldn't get him to stop crying. He just cried and cried. He was drooling and putting his fingers in his mouth.

I gave him some tylenol and brought him in the living room to rock him. He still screamed but I got him to calm down a little bit. Finally, the tylenol kicked in and he fell asleep and I got him back in his bed.

We never went through this with Maggie. It's painful to watch.

So, what worked for you? Any tips to get him some quick relief?

Christmas pajamas

Maggie loves to wear the pajamas that I got her for Christmas. They are really cute and have little polka dots all over them.


Tonight, she told me that when she was younger (last month), she thought that if she wore her Christmas pajamas that it would be Christmas when she woke up in the morning.

Maybe that's why she wears them so much!

The O'Coles

Some people have accused my husband and I of wanting to be Irish. We named our kids Maggie and Patrick!

I wish I could show you the picture of the 2 cuties dressed for St. Patrick's day. If you want a picture, email me and I will share them with you.

I am trying to come up with a cute idea for what to do to Maggie's room when she comes home from school. I think a leprachaun might make a visit and leave her some candy! What do you do for your kids on St. Patty's day?

Coo coo

I got a new camera.

Woot had a great deal on a point and shoot camera. Maggie enjoys posing for my new toy, but she thinks I am a little crazy with my camera.

God's sovereignty l

This is a hard blog to write. Steven has been speaking on God's sovereignty lately and how He has a much, much bigger plan than we can imagine. I hate not knowing what is going to happen. I wish I could go into the future, see what is going to happen and then come back to my normal, right now life. I think I could handle it better.

Patrick's bio mom is back. She wants visits. There's so much there that I can't even begin to explain. But, it means, once a week, I have to interact with her and hand over my baby to her. Technically, he is her son, but she had never seen him before this past Monday. He was taken immediately at birth and she never saw him after that.

So, this Monday was the dreaded day. The first time she ever saw him. She came in with lots of family members and it was so hard to let him go into the other room. I had to sit outside of a cubicle and listen to the madness inside. Luckily, we met his dad's parents the week before. They are such a blessing and we sat outside together awkwardly. What do you talk about while your babies are visiting with their other family?

Patrick had a wet diaper while he was visiting. They asked me for diapers and I went into the room to hand them to his mom. She wanted to change his diaper in the room and the social worker told her that she had to go to the bathroom to change him. However, she couldn't go to the bathroom alone with Patrick, she had to be supervised. She insisted on changing him in the room and the social worker insisted they use the changing station in the bathroom. I'm still standing at the doorway with the diapers. The social worker says,"just let the foster mom change his diaper."

His mom yells, "SHE's not changing him. I'm going to change him!". Whoa! Where did that come from? That's fine with me. I change his diaper 6-7 times a day. I don't care if you want to change him.

I walked out of the room. The social worker took her and both boys to the bathroom so she could supervise the interaction.

I was shaking. I walked back sat down and uttered a cuss word under my breath. I was so mad!

The visit was over. He smelled like their perfume. I took him home and he was exhausted and fell asleep so after. It was miserable. I was upset and how do I deal with all of these emotions? We knew the risk when we signed up for this. His mom could get it back together and take him. How will I be able to handle him living somewhere else? What if it's not a safe place?

So, on Thursday, I was by myself for a minute and I know that God was getting on to me. He is disappointed in my behavior. It doesn't matter what they do. Or how they act. My job is to be a witness for Him. I may not lead them to Christ, but I may be the only interaction that they have with a Christian. If I am acting like that, how can they see Him in me? Or what about to Patrick's dad's parents? What did they see? They saw me acting stupid and getting angry about a silly interaction.

Please pray for my family. This is extremely difficult. I forget that Patrick is a foster baby. He's our son and I can't even think about him leaving us. But, I have to interact with his other family for a while. I have to be a witness for Christ. The other stuff is not important. Christ is my first priority and I have to be constantly reminded of that.

Bedtime Prayers

Maggie feeding her brother oatmeal------>









Last night, I was putting Maggie to sleep. When we pray together, she asks me to pray first and she follows.

I thanked God for our family and for creating the world.

She followed:
Dear God,

Thank for you Daddy, Mommy and Patrick. Thank you for Memaw and Nah Nah. Thank you for Willie, Mickey and Sparky. Thank you for making everything in the world, except for
yucky bugs. I don't like those.

Amen.

Rainbow Brite giveaway

Do you remember Rainbow Brite? She was a part of my childhood. She was beautiful and she wore bright, beautiful clothing.

I was recently sent some CDs from Mom Select. It contains games and downloads and a cartoon from the new Rainbow Brite. She had a makeover!

I have about 5 CDs to giveaway. If you would like one, leave me a comment and I will get it to you.

Maggie loves playing the games and I think it would be best for girls around her age or maybe a little older.