Weight loss

On Friday, Steven and I were enjoying our Starbucks deliciousness and I asked him if he would be able to fit into his suit for Nikki and Jerry's wedding at the beginning of next month.

You see, Steven lost a lot of weight last year. I lost some weight, too. But, it's slowly creeping back on. I've gained about 10 pounds back this year and I didn't need to gain it. 10 pounds is a lot when you are 5 foot 2.

So, he said, "I guess I need to lose about 15 pounds before the wedding."

I almost spit out my Starbucks. But, I didn't. Cause that would be evil.

He was going to lose 15 pounds in 20 days?!

And the  crazy thing is that he probably will do it and I decided to join him in this crazy journey right before Christmas. I need to lose it and I really need to lose it before Lori's wedding. I have to get fitted for my dress at the end of January.

So, here we go. We're on day 2 and still feeling okay. No sugar does make me a little grumpy. But, the scale is already going down so that helps.  Wish us luck!

Starting again....

I joined weight watchers online last night. again. for the 3rd time. Is the 3rd time really the charm?

I just really want to be healthy. Honestly, I am quite comfortable at my weight. I've been here for so long. My jeans fit because I buy this size. I've bought this size for a really long time.

But, it's not a healthy weight. It keeps my blood pressure at a borderline level. I am exhausted. I want to nap every day at 3 p.m. I keep thinking that if I was exercising and eating better, I wouldn't want to hit the couch and sleep away the afternoon.

I want Maggie to have a healthy mommy. I want to be a mommy who is active and has energy to do things with her, even at 3 p.m. in the afternoon.

I feel a little discouraged. I have tried so many times before and I've failed. What makes this time different? Honestly, I don't know.

I am just hoping that it's different this time. I told Maggie that I was trying to eat healthy and exercise. She is so proud and told me that she wants to eat healthy too. She asked for an apple tonight and asks me questions about healthy food all day long.

I don't want to pass on my unhealthy habits to her. I think that if she sees me doing the right thing than maybe she will grow up and have different habits.

Maybe this try will be different?

Tales of the scale (continued)

Yesterday, I received a hilarious voice mail from a friend who will remain anonymous. She confessed that she was driving out of town for a couple of days and in her back seat was her scale!

I started thinking about my unhealthy obsession with that monster that is back on my bathroom floor. I once took my scale on a camping trip. Now, tell me how much sense that makes?

So, confession time? Have you ever packed your scale to go on a trip? Where did it go with you?

The scale

I have been trying to be really good with my eating. I have been very focused especially while Steven is gone. But, I get on the scale and see no movement at all. I get all frustrated and beat myself up. Why? It's just a number right?

So, yesterday afternoon, I hid my scale in my closet. Yep, I hid it from myself.

This morning, I felt so lost. I think I have weighed myself every morning since I was in college. I didn't know what to do. I kept thinking that I should go get it out of the closet. How dumb is that? Does it matter if the scale shows a lower number? Didn't I eat well yesterday? Why does it matter? I went round and round in my head.

After I left the house, I continued to think about it. So, I think the scale needs to stay in the closet. Maybe get it out once a week or something and check, but I am addicted to weighing myself. Who knew I was so trapped by it?